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May 26

How to lose a Great Gal

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Top 10 turnoffs for great women

amysepiastJust like women, most guys know right away whether or not they see potential in a woman. There’s that inner voice that tells you this is someone worth pursuing.  When the first date ends, you’re not even thinking about playing games. You know you want a second date. You wait your standard two days, call to set up that date and get the dreaded voicemail.  You leave a heartfelt message, but after three days it becomes clear this great gal is not calling you back. Where did you go wrong? Were you the only one feeling sparks over lattes?

Maybe the answer is to learn the top 10 turnoffs that make great gals wave goodbye. If any of these fictional guys sound like you, it’s time to change your approach.

Turnoff #1: Showboat Sammy

Maybe he owns a yacht off the coast of France. Maybe he has a timeshare in the Hamptons. Maybe his annual bonus is bigger than most guys’ salaries. That’s all well and good, but does it really need to be divulged on the first date?

Turnoff #2: Messy Melvin

A-list celebrities can pull off the unkempt look. First-daters need to pay attention to shaving, clothing and bad breath. If the guy can’t even put in the effort for a first impression, it doesn’t bode well down the road.

Turnoff #3: Rude Ricky

“Where’s our drinks, lady?” If a guy treats the service staff with a lack of respect, a great gal will likely assume he’ll do the same to her someday. The last thing anyone wants is to be talked down to or disrespected.

Turnoff #4: Cheap Charlie

There will always be debate about who should pay on a first date. Some guys are traditionalists and want to foot the bill; others expect a 50-50 monetary split. In most cases, offering to pay is the way to go. Let her pick up the tab on a future date.

Turnoff #5: Still-Married Mike

Marriage, separation and divorce are pretty cut-and-dry terms. If a guy says he’s separated when he really means he’s cheating on his wife, it’s going to cause trouble. Be honest from the get-go and let the dating chips fall where they may.

Turnoff #6: Hands-On Howard

Guys need to read the signals before assuming hand holding, massaging and other touchy-feely activities have the green light. Jumping too quickly to any form of intimacy can make any guy seem too aggressive.

Turnoff #7: Stereotyping Steven

“Oh, you’re one of those types of women.” Jumping to conclusions about a date from the way she answers one or two questions is a definite mistake. Let the date unfold before making assumptions about someone you just met.

Turnoff #8: Distracted David

His cell phone is ringing constantly, he’s popping away from the table every 10 minutes, and he keeps interrupting the conversation flow. First dates require focused attention — that means putting the phone on vibrate or mute, making eye contact and being present.

Turnoff #9: All-Business Ben

Some guys are great salesmen or outstanding negotiators. But there’s a time and place for business and a time and place for leisure. Guys who treat first dates like business transactions will never close the deal.

Turnoff #10: Nervous Nathan

He can’t sit still, he’s banging his fork on the table, and he won’t make eye contact for more than three seconds. Nervous antics are a real turnoff and make a great gal think a guy has something to hide. Work out the nervous kinks before the date starts.

article adapted from content By Jeff Cohen Special to Yahoo! Personals